![](/static/253f0d9b/assets/icons/icon-96x96.png)
![](https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/db7182d9-181a-45e1-b0aa-6768f144911a.jpeg)
Ah, the new American dream!
Ah, the new American dream!
I see your post has a few upvotes. Therefore, I will trust you implicitly on this matter. Thank you!
That’s a solid platform,! Where do I send campaign donations?
Ah, I see you have studied and understand the complexities of corporate finance. Well done, let’s give our CEO a 2,000% raise to celebrate!
-Corporate board somewhere, probably
RIP Carl Weathers
Or, you bottle it up inside and let it slowly destroy you.
I assume we both know for the same reasons. I’m sorry my dude.
Exactly…awesome!
A Short Hike is an excellent and short game. Super fun, very chill, great music, the whole package.
My friends, I would like to share a story with you.
August 2023. Afternoon. I am sitting at my desk in my office. The tell tale signs of something brewing begin to make themselves known. After a time, I reluctantly acknowledge that I won’t make it another 3 hours until I get home. I trudge downstairs to the less populated floor, as one does. An empty stall appears. I seat myself on the porcelain throne and an epic battle ensues. 15 minutes later the moment of dead arrives. I reach over to the dispenser and proceed to unroll.
Halfway through the standard multi-stage folding process, necessary to create something suitable for use, I pause. Something is different. This can’t be right…this is…no, that’s impossible. I look closer at the material in my hands. I rub it between thumb and index finger. I stare in disbelief. This is soft, comfortable, 2 ply material! Gods be praised! I proceed to give myself a royal treatment; the cleanest, most wonderful experience! I feel like a king as I wash my hands and return to my desk.
I dare not speak of this to anyone, for fear the mistake will be discovered. Over the next few weeks, I make several returns trips to the same location and am treated to the same royal cleaning. Life is good!
October. I have grown complacent in my comfort over the intervening weeks. One fateful day I make the trip downstairs, now fully expecting to do business in comfort. Post excursion I reach over, my fingers make contact with something akin to sandpaper. My hand freezes and my heart drops. The most wonderful 2 ply material is gone, replaced with the old standard rough, semi transparent tissue that always results in rectal bleeding. I curl over into a sitting fetal position and morn the loss of my comfy companion. Perhaps I shed a single tear, or cry or in pain, the memory is too traumatic to recall clearly now.
Six weeks later. Was it all a dream? Did I imagine the 2 ply material from heaven? I don’t think so, but it has not returned. Maybe, against all hope, it will return in the future. Only time will tell.
TL;DR - my office had 2 ply toilet paper for a few weeks and it was the most amazing thing ever.
A third Bill and Ted movie (Face the Music) came out in 2020, did you see that one?
I just want to say thank you, and I appreciate the team’s efforts to be excellent to each other.