my folks went vegan in the 80s, when it was really difficult to do that. I’ve eaten a lot of things of questionable, even suspicious nutritional value. the absolute weirdest, one that haunts my memory to this very day is seitan.

seitan is basically wheat gluten. it’s got little to no flavor and has the texture somewhere between a wet sponge and cotton balls (ever chewed on a cotton ball? would not recommend). one memorable thanksgiving, mom made a loaf of seitan, and it was off or I was getting sick but i felt unwell after eating it, so she prescribed me some charcoal pills. an hour or so later I was puking up pitch black chunky bile. it’s the sort of thing that sticks with you…

seitan: 0/10

next weirdest is brussels sprouts - not because they’re bad but because there’s a species of moth that lays its eggs in the sprouts. this is why you always want to boil the hell out of them or sear them on the grill (or in bacon fat, which is my favorite). cant really recommend eating moth larvae, it’s not vegan.

I went on a 100% carnivore diet for years after I turned 18.